After pursuing a master’s degree in computer science in my 40s, I got a web developer’s position. I was thrilled to have my career back after being a stay-at-home mother for a while. My previous career as a software engineer ended 15 years ago due to the international relocation.
It was an entry-level job with an undergrad graduate salary but I was extremely thankful to them for hiring me.
I worked very hard; I wanted to prove myself. I even brought work home and did it during the weekends.
Deep down, I was afraid that they would discover a mistake in hiring me so I never said no to anything they asked me to do.
One colleague always played music in the small office. I am a person who cannot focus on things while music is on, but I didn’t say anything. I just suffered.
I tried hard to blend in. I ended up getting very drunk at the party among all British colleagues who can hold their drink so well.
After working there for ten months, I started to be accused of things that I didn’t do. I became resentful and my stress level got elevated. I started to get sick very often.
After one year, I got laid off. I was so glad because I couldn’t mentally or physically take it any longer.
I thought they were wrong, that they were not very nice people. I was mistreated (my victim story).
Looking back, I notice that the way they treated me was how I treated myself. I had no respect for myself. They were giving back to me the energy that I was emanating.
The world always mirrors our self-worth and self-respect back at us.
The good news is that we hold the key to how people treat us. It’s our job. We are 100% responsible for our lives.
Do you have a situation you don’t like in your life?
If so, ask yourself, what did you do to allow or promote it to happen?
PS- This awareness from the job experience created the opportunity for forgiveness, not regret. I did the best I could as I didn’t know any better.
